Sunday, May 13, 2012

The Long Version

About two months ago I was reading a blog. On this blog the writer occasionally advocates for special need kids in China. She posted a picture of a sweet looking three year old boy in China who was born with a heart condition (transposition of the great arteries). He is currently living in an orphanage. His lips and fingers are turning blue - and he will die without this surgery. The orphanage will not provide the surgery.

I am always on the look out for how God is calling us...if not Bryan (a baby who'd been placed in our family for 29 days in Nov./Dec. 2011 before his birth mom changed her mind), then who or what? On a whim I emailed the blog writer asking for the contact info. of the agency. Then I sent an email to them, Great Wall China Adoption, to see if he still needed a family. In the meantime I talked with a friend who has done a special needs Korean adoption. I talked with her agency. For a China adoption you must make $10K for each family member including the new child. We don't. Apparently waivers used to be given by China for certain things...but this agency said the last few waivers they have applied for have been denied. Even waivers for special focus kids - those with more serious special needs. Okay God - that is a no go on China.

Then Great Wall China Adoption emailed me back about my inquiry about the 3 year old. I told them we didn't make enough money so I didn't think we could proceed. She emailed that we could fill out a form - with no commitment to their agency or this child - that she would submit it to China and see if a waiver is possible. Okay - why not? A few days later she sent me this child's medical write up and additional photos.  When she sent me the file she put this child "on hold" for us while we reviewed the file. What?! We were sure we wouldn't get the waiver, didn't really think about it much, AND asked her to take him off hold since we didn't even know if we would proceed. A month went by. I got an email with the subject line "Green Light!". Umm - what?!  Then I looked at the Great Wall photo listing and this child was *still* on hold for us. What? Apparently he has been on their list for several months and NO family has inquired about him. Families are MUCH more interested in girls AND his serious heart condition scares others away. Maybe God kept him on hold for us?

So Erik and I are talking...praying...talking...and came up with three very good reasons not to move forward with this adoption. 1. We don't have the money (It costs ~26K+) 2. We previously adopted a three year old and know how challenging it was at times for her - and she spoke English and wasn't even in an orphanage! 3. I have the baby bug/want a baby...and he is not one. That weekend we showed up at small group. The couple that lead the small group have adopted three kids - two from China (one is special needs). NO ONE ELSE showed up to small group! We spent the whole time asking them about their China adoptions and then we all prayed together about it. Totally a God thing! Erik and I decided to fast and pray the next day. We asked our older kids to join us in praying throughout the day. When we came together at the end of the day both of us felt God telling us to take the next step forward with this adoption. Surprisingly the kids agreed.

We don't have the money (we lack $21K of the $26K needed) and an international adoption seems daunting...but we are stepping forward in faith. We are trusting that if God wants him to be a part of our family we will be able to raise the funds. The typical time line is one year. If the doctors feel it is necessary due to his heart condition the agency can try and expedite his case. This would need to be done in terms of the US government and the Chinese Government. Expedite means he would be home in six months. Today we requested an updated echocardiogram. This will help the doctors determine how much longer he can live without surgery.

It seems overwhelming. One step at a time. We are under no illusion this will be a fairy tale. This child was three in January. He is in an orphanage, doesn't speak English, and is sick. It is very sad to read his medical file. Apparently it is illegal to put your child up for adoption in China. Birth parents will leave their babies in a public place where they will be found. Frequently the birth parents will hide around the corner to make sure their baby is found. He was left in a hospital waiting room - with a note saying his birth date (which made him 2 months old). It is hard just to turn our backs knowing that no other family has even inquired about him/wants to adopt him. Please pray with us that we are following God in this journey.


  1. Sandy, what an amazing story. We love you guys so much...a truly special family you have. We are keeping you in our thoughts and sending lots of positive energy your way and that sweet boy's way too. A fundraiser of some sort? What can we do to help? Much love, glenda, merirose and mason.

  2. You know I am crying, right? My heart is already praying like crazy. I am begging God through my sobs to let us help you financially and for this precious boy and you for your heart and the the tender hearts of your kids. I am so proud of you and excited to be a part of this journey with you. I will talk with Parker as soon as I can to see what God can do through us. I love you!